fear

Fear May Be Your Best Clue

Everything you want, that you don't have, will scare the shit out of you, if you take steps to bring it into your life. 

It doesn't seem fair, but it's true. 

The "safe" choices, won't scare you. Staying in the corporate job that sucks you dry, the marriage you are unhappy in, deciding not to trust anyone again, never getting back into the dating scene, not to starting your own business... need I go on? 

When we "don't rock the boat" we stay safe. 

You know what's scary? 

Following your deepest desires. I like to call them yearnings. 

Something you want soooo bad, you can taste it! 

And, that's scary as hell!  

You know, if you do it, if you follow it, things will happen that you can't predict. 

You'll be smack dab in the center of "the unknown." 

[Cue screaming]

What do you do? 

How do you deal with the fear and follow your deepest desires? 

Join me and my amazing co-host, Enolia Foti, for Cocktails and Coaching on Wednesday, August 28, at 5 pm Pacific and 8 pm Eastern. You'll hear how this New York City girl ended up being taught by the elders and grandmothers of indigenous cultures, and how she went from corporate America to healer. Her story is inspiring, and together, we'll unlock how fear can hold you back, or empower you!

Ask your question about fear, how the hell to actually follow your deepest desires, what it means to be a healer or anything else that's on your mind! Click here to submit your question.

We'll be live for Cocktails and Coaching in my private Facebook Group. If you aren't already a member, join Live Lavishly; The Art of Sustainable Transformation by clicking here.

Enolia and I can't wait to see you on Wednesday, August 28, at 5 pm Pacific and 8 pm Eastern. 

Massive Improvement in Record Time!

Seem too good to be true?

Usually anything that’s really massive takes a lot of time.

When it comes to improving your life…


Working with me as your coach, is a super-charged life-hack!!

Think about all the things that most of us have struggle with, probably, for years:

·      Childhood trauma.

·      Family drama and stress.

·      Fears about money.

·      Anxiety about job security.

·      Stress in relationships.

·      Coping with the rollercoaster of being an Entrepreneur.

Can you relate to any of these? If you’re like most of us, you can relate to more than one.

We get so used to them being in our lives, it feels normal. It can feel like who we are.

“I have anxiety issues.”

“My family is dysfunctional”

“I’m always worried I could lose my job or money. It happens all the time to people. I can’t afford to relax or take my eyes off the prize, even if it is exhausting me and making me sick.”

We begin to take on circumstances as if they are who we are.

That’s when we need a life-hack.

You are so much more than your circumstances. No matter how huge and impossible yours may seem.

Enter, best-life-hack-ever… a great life coach!

Why? No, it’s not because I am one.

Here’s why hiring a life coach will save you tons of money and tons of time while you create massive improvement in your life:

·      I am objective, I don’t have any preconceived ideas of you or your life.

·      I have no agenda for you. You can quit your job, leave your business, live off the grid, buy a mansion, take off a year to sail the world, risk everything to start a business, leave your marriage, get into a polyamorous relationship, never go home for the holidays again… respectfully, I don’t care about the “things,” or the circumstances.

·      I have no baggage with you. We’ve never had a disagreement or pissed each other off. I’m not blinded by my love for you, although I have love and compassion for you. I don’t know what you did as a teenager or at any point in your life before our first session. I don’t know your family and what their expectations, imperfections or biases are.

I only know you as you are, right now.

It’s a fresh start.

We’ll create who you want to become.

Will we dive into some of those past circumstances, family patterns and who you think you are. Those things are helpful to the process. Then we’ll fucking liberate you from the things that hold you back!

As your life-hack, life coach, we’ll focus on what you yearn for, the thoughts that stop you in your tracks and how to turn them around so that they become empowering. We’ll tackle the feelings that diminish and limit you and transform them into the feelings that your liberated new-self will feel, then we’ll take action. Action that is inspired, playful and in alignment with your highest good.

It’s fun. It’s fast (especially compared to years in therapy.) It’s life changing.

One of my recent clients described it this way, “I really do feel like a shiny new person Brenda. You have changed my life forever. Thank you!” Jennee

Let’s get your life-hack started. Book a 15-minute Discovery Call and we’ll explore how I can facilitate you getting the sustainable transformation you’re looking for. There’s no obligation or commitment. This is an exploratory call to see if I can help you and if so, how. I’ve got some openings in the next few days, so give yourself some relief. Let’s talk about what you need. Book your call now, right here.

How's your anxiety?

Anxiety hits all of us at some point.  

Sometimes it’s hot, heavy and never-ending. 

Sometimes it rushes in, out of nowhere, and grabs us by the throat.

It drives us into fear. Imagining terrible outcomes.

It’s always reminding us of something awful in the past or warning us about something awful in the future.

It masquerades as “helpful.”

As if it’s going to make you extra smart or extra resourceful in order to prevent or circumvent a terrible outcome it is imagining or remembering.

Think about it though.

Is it really helpful?

Does it really help you find your most creative, best possible outcome? Does it bring you to the best version of yourself?  

No.


Our best ideas, our best problem-solving skills come out of a place of peace and love. That’s why we ask friends and family for help when we’re struggling. We know they will think of something we won’t. Because they aren’t in anxiety about the situation.

Would you like to turn down the volume on your anxiety and turn up the volume on peace and love?

Then join me for From Darkness to Light. It’s a four-week, small group, coaching program. I’m only allowing 10 people in the group. It’s for men and women. We’re going to face anxiety head-on with tools and life-hacks that will turn down that volume. You’ll move you towards the peace and love that moves you into better decisions, less stress and into a better version of yourself.

I’ve priced it at a super reasonable $99. Get all the deets here and register. It won’t be a mistake, I promise. Your anxiety might not like it, but isn’t that the point??? <3 <3

From a Dark Night to a Balcony on the Beach?

Today I'm sitting on the balcony of a lovely hotel room overlooking the ocean, in my favorite place, La Jolla, CA. 

I've been very open this week about my own dark night of the soul, several of them actually. 

So, how did I get from a dark night of the soul to this balcony? 

Work. 

Yep. That's not sexy or even terribly intriguing. But, it's true. 

I worked every day to make my internal environment more important than my external circumstances. 

What does that look like? 

It looks like this: I launch a program and get nothing but crickets, I "need" the money to pay bills, nothing else good is happening professionally or financially, and I spend as much time as I need to shift my mindset and how I feel to abundance, instead of the scarcity and fear my circumstances could easily trigger. 

How did I do it? I use a lot of tools. One day one works, the next day it doesn't help at all and I need something else out of my bag of tricks! But between all the tools and the several online communities I get support from...I've gotten through each day. 

Is my struggle over? The gorgeous scene from my balcony is a bit deceiving. This moment, this weekend while I'm here I am totally enjoying all the abundance of it. That's one of my tools. Even when parts of my life are in crisis, I can find another part that isn't, and enjoy the hell out of that! I don't have to let the crisis define me. 

I'll bask in the abundance and glory of this balcony and weekend in my favorite place and know that the only thing that exists, is this present moment. 

And then, there will be a moment when I know what my next step is. For me these days, it's usually one step. I don't know the next 5 steps, just the next one. As Brene Brown says, "courage is the ability to be comfortable with discomfort." She didn't say, "courage is the ability to make discomfort go away. 

That's why I created both, From Darkness into Light and Cocktails and Coaching. Because Cocktails and Coaching is just plain old, good fun. And we all need that. Especially when we need tools to take us From Darkness to Light. They can both exist at the same time. 

Join me for Cocktails and Coaching on Wednesday's at 5 pm Pacific/8 pm Eastern in my private Facebook Group. You can join the group here. You can ask a question or tell me about a situation you want help with, here, and I'll address it live. 

If you're in crisis. If you're in anxiety, fear, confusion, self-doubt and spinning in negative self-talk, you need From Darkness to Light. I'm only allowing 10 people in the group to keep things intimate. Get all the details and register here. We start May 21 at 5 pm Pacific/8 pm Eastern, but I'll close registration as soon as it's full. 

If you have any questions, hit reply and let me know. Your email will be private and I'm the only one who will see it. 

What are you afraid of?

"Nothing bold or magnificent is created from fear." Paul Sabine, The Collection. 

If you've not watched The Collection on Amazon Video, I highly recommend it. It's all about a Paris fashion house at the end of WWII. 

I love this quote from the first episode. 

"Nothing bold or magnificent is created from fear." 

True that! 

So, that leads me to ask you....What bold or magnificent thing would you do, or create, if you had no fear? 

For me, right now, it's all about growing and expanding my business. 

What would it be for you? Tell me in the comments below. No fear. And, nothing is too bold or too magnificent! Tell me all about it! Shock me! Surprise me!