You’re moving through your day, everything is going smoothly and then…. You’re hit with a feeling that you didn’t see coming.

Maybe you find out an ex has passed away, or a friend got promoted including a big fat raise, or a neighbor is moving out of the area; and grief, jealousy or abandonment bubble up like foam on an ice cold beer!

You’re thinking, WTF?

You’ve not been close to your ex for years and resolved all your feelings around the breakup years ago.

You’re happy for your friend and their success.

You know you’ll stay in touch with the neighbor after they move, you have a great connection.

So where do all these “negative” feelings come from?

The truth is, it may not have anything to do with the actual situation. But it does have to do with that feeling and other times in your life it’s been buried or suppressed.

When we don’t allow ourselves to feel what we feel and to validate the feelings, they go underground. Like these 17-year Cicadas I’ve experienced this summer visiting my daughter and her family in Baltimore, MD.

This particular species of Cicadas are dormant for 17 years then for six-weeks they fly around, make tons of noise, lay eggs and die. The noise they make, collectively when thousands of them are in one backyard, is creepy and astonishing!

But back to our feelings! They can be like those Cicadas. Laying dormant for years, then something happens that “wakes them up!” And there they are, making all sorts of astonishing “noise” in your life!

What do we do? The preventative action is to allow ourselves the time and space to feel our feelings no matter what they are and how inconvenient it is. That’s part of why coaching provides so much value to my clients, they get the space they need to feel all their feelings, and they get them validated. When that happens, they subside pretty quickly. Even the big ones.

If it’s too late for that and you realize a feeling has “awakened” that’s OK. Now you know, it’s something that you didn’t give yourself the time and space for before. When have you felt that way in the past? What might still be unresolved from that experience? Journal about it, get it out. Call a friend, book a session with me. Whatever you need to give yourself and the feeling the time and attention you need and deserve so the feeling can subside in a loving, natural way.

I’d love to hear what feelings you have that “awaken” like a Cicada! Comment down below and tell me about it.