Infinite Possibilities

Tired of overwhelm and ready for a positive vibe? 

With the number of tasks that are on the list to do, EVERYDAY, in each of our lives, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. 

Overwhelm is a natural reaction to either too many things to do and/or feeling like you don’t have all the resources you need to get something done.  

The lack of resources could be time, or something a little less tangible, like, you simply don’t know WHAT to do to solve the problem. Or there are so many problems, it feels insurmountable. 

I know what that’s like and so does my co-host for this week’s Cocktails and Coaching! 

Join me and my amazing co-host Alex Ellis of AE Wellness (IG@hollaformala) on Wednesday, August 19 at 5:00 pm Pacific and 8:00 pm Eastern for a positive vibe and great conversation! 

Alex is a self-proclaimed “body-nerd,” entrepreneur and a “put your money where your mouth is” when it comes to living from a positive vibe instead of overwhelm or pain. Her super-power is helping women get out of pain. She’ll tell you more about it on Wednesday. 

You can ask Alex and me a question on the form on my website, BrendaFlorida.com, grab your drink and let’s get real! 

Everyone experiences overwhelm and everyone wants to live in a positive vibe. 

We’ll give you tips on getting out of overwhelm and we’ll definitely create a positive vibe! You’ll be so glad you came! 

Oh! And don’t forget, it all happens in my private FB Group, Live Lavishly: The Art of Sustainable Transformation. If you aren’t a member, click here and join this cool group of super positive and supportive folks! 

The day I almost slapped someone for telling me to be grateful!

You’ve heard it.

“Find something you’re grateful for.”

“Write down three things a day you're grateful for.”

Gratitude has become the end-all, cure-all practically.

When you’re drowning in fear, overwhelm and despair… it’s a little hard to find.

I remember last fall, I was having a very bad day that was part of a very difficult couple of months.

As a coach, and living my life pretty publicly on social media, I am committed to authenticity.

Which gets tough when you’re in an extended crisis.

I want to be real and… who wants to listen to a life coach who’s depressed!?

On this particular day, I was overwhelmed. I couldn’t see any end to my challenges. And this delightful person, whom I love, said the dreaded words… “Find something to be grateful for!”

I wanted to slap her!! (We were on the phone, which saved both of us from knowing if I would have!)

She insisted. That’s the way she is.

After several minutes… I succumbed. I really just wanted to get her off the phone and go back to my despair.

And then, I felt it.

A tiny shift.

Damn it! This gratitude thing works! I had forgotten.

I thought of two or three really simple things. I think the first thing I thought of was, “I’m breathing.” Which lead me to seeing something in the room I was in that I thought was pretty. Which led me to thinking of the person I was staying with and how grateful I was to be staying with her.

And there you have it. It didn’t solve all my problems. I still had a bunch of shit hitting the fan. There still wasn’t any end in sight as far as that shit went, but…

I felt a release.

I felt a little lighter.

My mind calmed down.

And from there I decided what to do next.

I don’t really remember what I did. I might have decided to take a nap, or a shower, or watch inspirational videos on YouTube, but I did something different than drown in my fear.

Damn it. Maybe gratitude is the end-all, cure-all!

Gratitude is one of the many tools we’ll be unpacking and mastering during my four-week coaching program, From Darkness to Light. Instead of wishing hard-times would magically leave, we’re taking them head-on! We’ll stare fear in the fucking face and win.

The mantra for the program is, “There’s no power outside of you greater than the power inside of you!” For those of you in the program, you’ll leave knowing that is true!!

There are only a few spots left, so get the deets and register here.

If you know a friend who needs the tools and support that From Darkness to Light will deliver, please share this email with them so they can join us. There’s no need to navigate the darkness alone. <3

What is your experience with gratitude? If you don’t have one. Try it. Tell me what happens!


Grab a Cocktail and Let's Get REAL Together!

I love to eat and drink with people.

There’s something about gathering around a good drink and some great food that allows for a certain intimacy and openness that isn’t always easy to find.

That’s why I always have my favorite hangouts in any city I visit often or live in.

Because I’m currently living a “location independent” lifestyle, I decided to create such a space myself!

In a perfect world, I’d make your drink for you, even fix some great appetizers or dinner, but alas…that also creates a lot of logistic limitations.  

I’m creating Cocktails and Coaching as a virtual answer to my logistic limitations!

While I can’t make your drink, I’ll count on your for that, I can create an open, safe and fun environment where we can hang out, have a few laughs and open up to the things that puzzle us, bother us, that we’re stuck on, pissed off by, surprised by and delighted by!

Nothing is off-limits in Cocktails and Coaching. You bring it. We’ll talk about it. I’ll give coaching tips and tricks, life-hacks and other bits of wisdom. (The more you drink the wiser I get!)

I’m also inviting a cool co-host each week. I’m stoked about that!

Our first Cocktails and Coaching will be on Wednesday, May 15, 5:00 pm Pacific, 8 pm Eastern.

We’ll gather in my private Facebook Group, Live Lavishly: The Art of Sustainable Transformation. If you aren’t a member, use this link to join.

This is an “all guys, all gals” welcome sort of party! The FB Group is now open to men and women. I love coaching men and have always felt it unnatural to exclude them so... welcome guys!

To submit a question or topic you want us to discuss and coach around, just fill out the form on my website at www.BrendaFlorida.com/Cocktails-Coaching

My first co-host is the intuitive, gorgeous and incomparable, Jess Bubbico! Jess has a weekly radio show, Method Meets Magic and she is a genius, intuitive coach. You can find out more about Jess and her free Facebook Challenge here.

Let’s do it! Invite your friends. Submit your questions and topics. Grab your cocktail and join me, every Wednesday at 5 Pacific/8 Eastern in the Facebook Group, for Cocktails and Coaching!

I can't wait to see you at the first gathering of Cocktails and Coaching in the private FB Group, Live Lavishly, on Wednesday, May 13, 5 pm Pacific, 8 pm Eastern! 

Two things you can't avoid

No, not death and taxes.

It’s change and sex.

Life changes. Relationships change. Careers change. Kids cause all kinds of change. Moving changes everything. Aging changes things. Finances change.

 Sometimes we choose change, sometimes it chooses us, but it’s coming, no matter what.

Sex.

Why did I have to bring that up, you ask?

That’s why! Because whether we like it or not, it’s a natural part of life. Whether you’re having it, or not. Whether you’re getting as much as you want. Whether your partner wants as much, or as little as you. Whether you’re single and wanting someone to have it with.

 We can try to not think about it, but it’s always there.

Enter, Life Coach.

As a coach, everything I coach clients through has something to do with these two.

The client wants change and needs help creating it.

Change happened to the client and they need help navigating it and learning how to see life from a new perspective.

They are frustrated sexually because they aren’t getting what they want, whether that’s more of it or less of it. They want to experiment or change something and they aren’t sure how to address it with their partner, or they are trying to sort through how they even feel about sex after a sexually bothersome or abusive situation. Where the hell do you go to talk to someone about and of that??

Right here.

These two, change and sex, are in my zone of genius. I eat problems like this for lunch, then come back for more!

There’s something thrilling about liberating someone else to the freedom, clarity and joy that is possible when they solve problems and explore what’s possible.

I’m like a possibilities expert. I’ll help you find what’s possible, whether you’re where you’re at by choice or change. Your decision or someone else’s.

There are three ways we can work together.

They’re all easy. They all get you results. What’s best for you based on the problem you want to solve and your style for learning new skills. Some folks are super DIY. Other’s need more personal attention.

1.     Think Your Way to Success – This is a digital, DIY program. Once you register a link to the content (videos and a worksheet) are delivered to your inbox. You can watch the videos as often as you want and fill out worksheets to your heart’s content. The focus of this program is stressful thoughts. Change is stressful, and every stress comes with a thought. I’ll teach you how to slay the thought and liberate yourself to a more peaceful path that is full of possibilities you didn’t see before. It’s truly magical.

2.     One Big Change – You guessed it. This is perfect when you want to create change in your life. It’s a combination of recoded lessons, weekly challenges and inspiration that are delivered to your inbox on Monday, Wednesday and Friday for four weeks. You get to keep all the recordings to listen to whenever you need a refresher. This is a combination of DIT and personal attention because you also get two, 30-minute private coaching sessions with me when you register for this program.

3.     Private, one-on-one coaching. This is when you really want to make fast, deep change in your life. Because we spend all our time focused on you and your problem that needs solving, I can coach you into a deeper understanding of yourself and the complexities of the problem. Everything is very specialized to you and what you want and need out of coaching.

Not sure which option is best for you? Click here to schedule a 15-minute call and we’ll figure it out together. <3

Freebies

I always like to provide free ways for people to work with me as well. I create quality content and love the emails and messages I get back about how inspiring and helpful my blogs, masterclasses and videos are to people. Which, by the way, always makes my day! If you aren’t on my email list, click here to sign up.

There’s an ongoing conversation about sex, it’s challenges, curiosities, impact on relationships, how to get comfortable when you’re back in the dating game, etc. going on through my YouTube Playlist, Qs for the Sex Queen. You can submit questions anonymously through my website here, and watch the videos here. A new episode is coming out in the next few days, so submit your questions now and I’ll answer them in that episode.

If you’re a woman, I have a free Facebook Group that is awesome! You’ll get support and tons of positive information and affirmations for you and your journey. Join that group here and answer two easy questions. I’ll have you added in no time! Private FB Group request to join.

Let’s end 2018 and begin 2019 with all the tools and yummy goodness available to us and have a rockin 2019!!

What are you afraid of?

"Nothing bold or magnificent is created from fear." Paul Sabine, The Collection. 

If you've not watched The Collection on Amazon Video, I highly recommend it. It's all about a Paris fashion house at the end of WWII. 

I love this quote from the first episode. 

"Nothing bold or magnificent is created from fear." 

True that! 

So, that leads me to ask you....What bold or magnificent thing would you do, or create, if you had no fear? 

For me, right now, it's all about growing and expanding my business. 

What would it be for you? Tell me in the comments below. No fear. And, nothing is too bold or too magnificent! Tell me all about it! Shock me! Surprise me!

 

Now What?

Last Thursday I asked if you knew what you wanted.

Hopefully, you shared what you want in the comments on Thursday. If not, feel free to share it here.

Now, let’s go from dreaming to scheming!

Scheming

If you have a dream that you’ve been telling yourself isn’t possible or that you don’t have enough time, enough money or any number of other stories your mind might have come up with, then you don’t spend time scheming about how it might be possible.

The enemy of possibility is dismissal.

As soon as we dismiss a dream, desire or yearning, we’ve killed it.

Like stomping on a bug, dismissal takes what’s possible and smashes it.

I’m going to ask you to be brave enough to believe in possibilities. We can’t scheme without some tiny corner of our mind thinking it’s possible.

Ready. Set. Go!

Think of your dream as a new playmate. It’s time to get to know each other. To play. To be curious. To open yourself up.

Instead of a bug that needs squashing, this is your new best friend.

What can you do for her? What would you like to do to please her? To get to know her? How can you spend time with her?

This strategy works with dreams of all sizes. Maybe you’re overwhelmed with work or kids or aging parents or any number of things and your dream is to spend a few hours alone. It may feel impossible. It may feel selfish. It isn’t.

It’s your dream because it is important. If Coco Chanel hadn’t gotten so tired of wearing uncomfortable clothes, she wouldn’t have designed pants for women. Thank goodness she was “selfish” enough to do that!

Love yourself enough to scheme about your dreams.

Let’s go back to the dream of a few hours alone. As impossible as your thoughts may tell you it is, start scheming. Get a girlfriend to help. As they say, “where there’s a will, there’s a way.” Get a babysitter. Barter with a friend to swap kids, ask for help from a friend or family member.

Love yourself enough to take what you want seriously.

For the bigger dreams like starting a business, taking a trip to a far-off land, going back to school for a degree, writing a book or becoming an actor, its’ the same process. Get to know your dream. What does she need? What would please her? What does she like to do for fun?

Break it down. Don’t worry about doing anything yet. This is all about scheming. Brainstorm with yourself and trusted friends how you might be able to take steps toward your dream.

Love yourself enough.

We need your dreams to come true, from taking a few hours for self-care to writing that book or taking that trip. We need your dreams the way we needed Coco to get sick of her corset and design beautiful pants for women!

Dream Killers!

I have had some serious dream killers in my life!

Maybe you can relate.

When I was young, I had dreams of a successful business, a great marriage, large loving family, a big house and a lot of traveling. By the time I was in my mid 40’s the only ones of those dreams I really had was the large loving family. I had traveled some, but not nearly as much as I wanted.

What did I do?

I started to give up.

I killed most of my dreams. Why?

I decided I wanted too much. I was getting older and I should be happy with the life I had! After all, I had a large loving family, a good job, I was reasonably happy being single, and an apartment I liked.

What a DREAM KILLER! 

By deciding some of my dreams weren’t important and that I had missed my window, I was in my 40’s after all, I killed them. The good news is, they didn’t stay dead for long. I decided to take action and that’s what I want to help you do.

If you’ve ever killed a dream, I invite you to take my free Dream Killers Challenge. Take the quiz as a quick inventory of what your dream killers might look like. Then use the Dream Killers CPR Dreamsheet to breathe some life back into those dreams! Maybe you’ll be like me, and so many of my clients, who realize their dreams, as Billie Crystal said in The Princess Bride, are only “…mostly dead. And there’s a big difference between mostly dead and all dead.”

Join me in the Dream Killers Challenge!

Use this link to get your Dream Killers Quiz and Dreamsheet delivered to your inbox!